Coming Back.

I’m coming back- and I feel like I have so so much to talk about and share, and it’s going to take much time to get out of my crazy brain.

I’m thinking so much lately.  Thinking of now, thinking of the past, thinking of future.

Thinking about how I know God’s never let me go,

he’s not going to tomorrow,

he’s not going to ever.

And his one desire is to love me and have me love him so much(Required reading:crazy love by francis chan).

Love more than anybody on this earth could love.  In a good way, I’m having a hard time understanding that.

This day, that means stopping working for a few hours to write this blog post and read and love back.

I’m realizing so much that when you know someone loves you so much it makes you love them more.

Circular love.

so it’s been a week.

It’s been over a week since I last wrote, and I’ve been thinking about lots of things, but for the most part, I’ve been thinking about this nugget my friend Matt gave me:

“Faith is not a feeling”

I’ve just been struggling though not “feeling it”, but I’m in the Bible every day, and I am so blessed.

It’s alot to wrap my head around.

Blue, unlike Pop

“I believe that the greatest trick of the devil is not to get us into some sort of evil but rather have us wasting time.  This is why the devil tries so hard to get Christians to be religious.  If he can sink a man’s mind into habit, he will prevent his heart from engaging God.”

So, over the past week, I haven’t been blogging.  If you’ve followed me as close as I do for any amount of time, then you’d notice every once in awhile I take more than a few days off and refresh.  Usually, it’s not planned.

When I started reading Blue Like Jazz, I didn’t think it would disturb me so much.

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A great day

I had a great day working today.

It was fantastic.

People were happy.

I am thankful.

Sometimes it doesn’t feel like work when you like it so much.

(I like it so much.)

That’s all for now!

Brokenness (is where I need to be)

Last night I was praying.

I’m in a tough place with work.  I don’t have much of it.

My pride tells me I need to get moved out of my parent’s house, but I’ve literally contacted everyone I know about work, and lots of people say they want to hire me but there’s no work.

I was telling this to God last night, and I just felt peace.

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Love

I don’t really know what to write today, so here we go:

Love each other.  With love that says, “I understand we are all messed up people”.

Spend time with Jesus.

Love the Bible.

And let all that pour out in your life today.

Because without love we are nothing.

Forgiveness and Pride

The reason I struggle with forgiveness is because I struggle with pride.  On the surface I think I can appear perfect even though deep down inside I know the truth….or at least most of it.

If, for just one second, I can let go of trying to look like I have it all together, then I can forgive.  Then I can actually do what God has called me to do.

After all, Jesus could have saved his own life and condemned us all to hell, but instead he went through with dying and saved us.

There was no pride there.  Just forgiveness.

I need to practice that so much more.

Patience…and Slowing down.

Anne Jackson wrote an awesome post a couple days ago about slowing down.

I quickly scanned through the words and tried to pick something up on my way through various blogs.  I didn’t get much.

Then I talked on the phone for half the day, booked some new work.

Then I ran out the door to hang out with my girlfriend.

Spent those next few hours mostly running around, not stopping to enjoy the scenery.

Dropped her back at school,

Was driving back home, lots of stuff on my mind….

AND THEN….bum bum bah….

I hit a red light at all 3 traffic lights on the downhill towards home.

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Our God

“Our God is greater

our God is stronger

God you are higher than any other.

Our God is healer

awesome in power

Our God, Our God.

And if our God is for us

than who can ever stop us.

And if our God is with us

than what could stand against us?

Think about these words for a few minutes today.  This is our God, who we get to serve.

(lyrics by Chris Tomlin)

on communication.

Over the past few months I have really been learning a lot about communication.

One day it’s making sure I talk with my boss so we’re on a same page.  I learned this the hard way- getting a call saying “you still on for tomorrow?”, when I wasn’t ever confirmed for that date of work.

Other times it’s been between Abby and I- we are a ridiculous couple.  God has made us, man and woman so differently, and yet so often we think that we’ll perceive things the same.  Once in awhile, we get tension between each other because we just don’t talk it out, assuming the other knows what we’re non-verbally communicating- we’re working on that one!

It seems like often it’s so hard to initiate communication, like my greatest insecurities come out when I just think about communicating.

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